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Begin at the beginning!
Hello reader and thank you for stumbling on to my little corner of the internet. I hope my words fascinate you, make you think, inspire you to explore your own inner world or help you understand someone else (possibly me, but hopefully someone you actually know). To begin at the beginning I will tell you…
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Nno – Welcome
When my time comes, will I be welcomed home, to the land of my forebears? Will the land say thank you for returning back to us, for this your final journey? Will they hail and salute me as I travel to my resting place? What will they say? I do not know the answers, but…
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The rain
Today of all days, it cries my tears for me. Floods, non-stop. It worries, threatens to spoil everything, to remove my composure. But also it washes away the dirt, the dust, the hurt. It renews, it refreshes, it heals. After the rain, the sun will return. After the rain, our life without him begins. Ify
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The lull
It’s coming, I know it is. I don’t know if I’m pretending, not realising, or forgetting. Am I distracted or am I doing this on purpose? Today, the answer to the question is I’m ok, thanks. Tomorrow when he arrives, his body, the shell, arrives, absent of HIM. The HIM that loved me, the HIM…
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I’m good, thanks
I’m good, thanks. My stock response. Sometimes true, mostly false, but what else am I supposed to say? The question ‘how are you?’ asked with no care, no consideration. A platitude, a lubricant. How would you react if I told you I was heartbroken, grieving? Told you I was wounded, confused, angry, drowning? That the…
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Absence
Love from the start. Love in the middle. Love before the end. Love, though the price you will pay will be pain. I can assure you the absence would be worse. Ify
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Acquaintances
They avoid me. Avoid it. Avoid my feelings, my pain. Avoid my thoughts, my words. Smile in the good times, avoid in the real times. They say Ah, I forgot. Yeah, I remember. Silence Silence Silence But I don’t speak, don’t offer. Why bother. They avoid me. I avoid it. Ify
What I Mean When I Say I'm Ok
When spoken words fail you…
This is how it all started…
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Ify Okolo-Grebe
I’m Ify, a professional, a wife, a mother, a first generation something, and a person who feels a lot but can’t find the words when speaking, so writes instead.